Over the last few days I've been sharing a lot about me feelings around lack of true choice in my life and how others in my life may respect or disrespect these choices. And ultimately that is their choice.
However because I have CP and epilepsy legally the law said for my safety and the safety of others I must be seizure free for two years before I can drive. At this point some of my friends are horrified that the thought of driving would enter my head.
Sorry to disappoint you guys but as I close my eyes at night my dreams are filled with jumping in a car, usually and certain old blue ford once owned by a friend for some strange reason that continuously mystifies me.
I reason the psychological makings of my mind are forever frustrate my the lack of freedom and often feeling the lack of freedom to make my own choices about the simplest things like how I want my toast cooked and the right not to have butter or margarine under my cheese, or 'fat on fat', as I tell support workers.
Legally I am forbidden from taking the keys of my parents car and driving it to the Gold Coast. That is of course assuming in backing it out the drive way, I didn't let go of the brake and loss control landing in the front door of the nieghbouries across the road or was pulled up by the first police car I pass and taking into custody for driving with out a licensed. I think we can all think of worst sernioes so will stop this dream right here.
As I do make a choice to obey, the laws determined by the various levels of the governments in Australia and thus far have little experience of the justice system. As I been endeavoring to illustrated over the last few days, our choices large or small have conquencies, whether I make them or the Prime Minister makes them on our behalf. Whatever we choose we must the live with the result of those choices.
Our nightly news headlines are filled with examples of the results of some of the choices people make. Sadly in making these choices, the lives of others are tragically impacted with devastating results. Often as was the case in Boston this week these stories are the result of an individuals choice to not act within the laws of their country for reasons you and I will never comprehend.
However not all the stories that make the nightly news bulletins are the result of criminal acts or wrong doing. Sadly even the right choices or the choices we make that are lawful can meet with tragedy. There are times we choose to fly to our holiday destinations and for reasons beyond out human comprehensions the plane crashes and we lose love ones forever.
When trying to explain my right to choice to new support workers I often use the illustrations involving of the family or company car.
My game begins something like this . . .
'Did you drive to work today?'
Confused they answer of course I did!' looking at me very strangely. What can driving to work have to do with making choices. 'Am I driving you to Woolies today?'
'Yes you are I am choosing to do my shopping at Woolworth today. However my question is did you choose to drive to work today?'
'Yes I did, I knew you were planning to go shopping at Woolies today.'
'I know last night we decided to do the shopping today. But you still made THE CHOICE to drive to work, as you left the house this morning.
At this point the worker is starting to get frustrated and Debbie you're point being? and then the defense, 'Well how else was I going to get to work and take you shopping? What other choice did I have?
The worker here has a valid point. There are no buses or trains that run directly to my house, the office or her next client. In our daily lives we often feel we make the only choice we can at that time. In the same way my worker feels it it her only choice to drive to work, I too feel my only transport choice is a maxi taxi and allowing for incredible waiting delays. We all feel there are times in our lives when we make the best choices we can under the cirmustances. However even when we feel we are making the only choice we can, our choices are choices all the same.
My support worker could of chosen not to come to work, and making that choice results in the conquences of loss of income for her and might mean the is no other support workers able to take me shopping that day. Hardly decisions that are going to change the world, but choices with results all the same.
So on this particular day, my support worker, indeed chose to drive to work so I could do my shopping at Woolworth. Having now establish the support worker chose to drive to work that morning, I play devil's advocate.
'Where do more fatalities occur than anywhere else?
She replies, 'close to home'
'While driving on the road?' I ask.
'Yes, and you're point is?, looking at me somewhat down funded again.
'You made the choice to drive to work today knowing there was a potential to have a car accident and having acknowledge knowing the risks, you and I are about to choice to take that same risk to drive to Woolworth in order to do my shopping.'
'Yes' and sometimes the penny drops and sometimes it doesn't. Life requires us to make choice to get out of bed in morning or to roll over and turn the alarm clock off. Sure we might not have a job the next day if we make that choice, but while we choose to continue to live (because others have made a choice not to live.) we are forced to make a series of choices that will impact our lives and the lives of those around.
We do not get to control life. The results of our choices are not always what we expect and at times when our love ones are taken from us in car accidents we don't like the results. Yet in the main most of us chose to drive or be a passenger in a car with the full knowledge of the results no being what we anticipate at the end of the day.
As Forest Junck said, "Life is like a box of chocolates!" We can chose the chocolate we want from the box but we don't always like the centers inside.
While my epilepsy makes illegal for me to drive a car. There is nothing illegal about choosing to live alone. Yet often that decision meets with the same reaction. Its too dangerous for you to live on my own. I like millions of people on this planet make a choice based on a calculated risk that an injury or death may result if I have a seizure. I have made a choice not to break the law and drive a car and I have made a choice to live on own.
The conquenices of both choices is potentially fatal. However statistics tell us I am more likely to die as a result of my decision to be a passenger in a car, than a seizure in my own home. Yet only the second of these two choices is faced with opposition.
Yes! Life is like a box of chocolates often we don't like the taste as we bite inside and then its too late. As I am about to make my next selection, I take a calculated risk that you and I may not like the taste inside. But I am going to take a bite anyway on the off chance I might really enjoy it.
Let me know if you like to chose your own chocolate or you want me to choose for you?
No comments:
Post a Comment